Changing gays is ‘damaging,’ one-time proponent now says

Can a person’s sexual orientation be changed?  This has been a point of dispute in many church meetings I have attended.  It seems to me that one of the main issues that is ignored in these arguments is just what "sexual orientation" we are talking about.  I suspect that for someone who is somewhat attracted to both sexes, a change to exclusive heterosexual behaviour is a very different proposition than for some one strongly attracted only to their own gender. Definitions aside, I found an interesting news article some time ago on the United Churches of Christ website.

Andy Lang reports (July August 20030 that one Jeremy Marks "a founder of the United Kingdom’s first ex-gay counselling network known as “Courage”-was touring the United States, now acknowledging that the idea that homosexuals can be transformed into heterosexuals was not only realistically impossible, but psychologically and spiritually damaging."

He quotes Marks as saying that “After 13 years of counselling, we failed to change a single homosexual.... Gays can choose whether or not to follow Christ, but they cannot choose their sexual orientation.”

Lang reminds us that many Christians believe that sexual orientation is not a fixed condition, but  learned behaviour that can be "unlearned through prayer, counselling and support".  He notes that some professional counsellors also insist this is so.  He goes on to say that "other Christian counsellors argue that transformation ministries are a death trap for many homosexuals-perpetuating feelings of guilt and selfhatred that can impair relationships and result in suicide."